Post by DornKoon on Nov 16, 2023 18:10:54 GMT
General Information
"What? I'm making s'mores?" (Evil laugh)
Full Name:
Salem Saberhagen
Codename or Alias:
Mr Saberhagen (He insists upon it)
Anonymity
Public (To most of the world, he is... a cat)
Gender:
Male
Race:
American Shorthair (And darn proud of it!)
Age:
500+
Place Of Birth:
"The Other Realm" - Salem was born in an other-dimensional world set aside as a home for witches, mystical beings and other members of the magical community. It has many different names and iterations and mainly functions as a safe haven for magic practitioners to escape the world of mortals.
Occupation/Status:
Liaison - Functions as an advisatory role for other factions needing Magical knowledge. Maybe it was petty of Strange to appoint him this position, but he has no complaints about swinging his weight around, as small as it is from a physical sense. It was certainly pettiness from Doctor Strange that made sure he would send Salem to any requests from the Justice League.
Alignment:
Neutral
Factions:
Darkwatch - Forced membership due to his sentencing as a cat.
Canon Or Original?:
Canon (Archie Comics)
Powers/Abilities:
Weapons/Items:
"Here's my Christmas list, can opener!"
"But you wouldn't be able to use a can opener."
"To HIT you with!"
Enchanted Kitty Collar: An enchanted collar that Salem was given (forced to wear) as part of his recent community service duties as Liaison for Darkwatch. It has been designed to protect him from danger and harm should he find himself in such a situation. If danger is detected, such as him being attacked or similar, an extremely powerful spell creates a protective sphere around the cat. It is durable enough to take a blow from the likes of Superman, or blasts of powerful spells, without breaking. It also protects Salem from any harm while inside it... it is also very portable and, to the glee of some young heroes... puntable, less so for the occupant.
Appearance
Physical Appearance:
Salem is an American Shorthair cat with black fur and piercing yellow eyes. Due to his own pride and sometimes the intervention of others, his fur is kept well-groomed and clean. He is the average size of an American Shorthair, roughly 25cm in height and 38cm in length. His weight varies wildly depending on how much he has gorged himself on tuna, but on average, he is slightly over the recommended 7 kg of an adult male.
Clothing and Armor:
"I dressed up as Madame Moon for last year's Halloween party; she turned my fur red for a week, and I'm not even close to ginger... I have a soul!"
Despite being a cat, Salem is in possession of a surprisingly big wardrobe of different outfits, ranging from hats down to fancy shirts and even his very own specially tailored suit.
Personality
"Dogs guard. Cats watch... and judge."
Sexual Orientation:
Bi-curious
General Personality:
The sound of the can opener is the only thing that makes me feel truly alive.
On the surface, and most of the time, Salem is known for his sharp wit and sarcastic sense of humour. He often makes clever remarks and provides comic relief in various situations, usually at the expense of himself, albeit not often intended that way. He is also something of a coward, maybe due to being largely powerless as a cat compared to how powerful he used to be as a warlock. He also tends to have a cynical outlook on life, viewing things with a dry sense of grimness. That doesn't mean he cannot be manipulative when he wants or stands to gain something. Despite being a cat, Salem is quite cunning and often tries to manipulate situations to his advantage, with mixed results.
Still, due to his many years as a cat, Salem has come to regret many of his choices as a human wizard. He has at least some regrets for the actions that led to his punishment. If this comes from a place of genuine remorse or more from the annoyance of being a cat remains to be seen, he would claim the former. He is, and will always be, a schemer. His ambitious plotting often includes attempts to become wealthy, achieve celebrity status, regain his magical powers, and return to his human form. He has a knack for giving poor advice, often involving using magic to solve a problem, which always creates more trouble than it solves.
Salem has a habit of using a high-pitched, whiny voice or a low-toned voice when talking about something humorous and often purposely places emphasis on the wrong syllable when saying certain words or names. He also sometimes switches the "a" and the "y" in words that end in "ay," such as wanting to rename Friday to "Fridya!" He also frequently uses the phrase "geh?!" when surprised or scared.
His favourite pastimes include playing with yarn, lint spotting, and surfing the internet (pretending to be a woman for attention). He loves Lizard Flakes, a snack for cats which is said to be fattening and full of cholesterol.
Despite his arrogance, greed, and sarcasm, he does really care about those close to him.
Face/Voice:
Nick Bakay (Voice)
Anything Else?
Character's History
Siblings:
Mother:
France Trumfull Saberhagen
Father:
Gummo Saberhagen
Other Family:
Annabelle Saberhagen (daughter)
Morty Saberhagen (uncle)
Goliath Saberhagen (uncle)
Humphrey Saberhagen (grandfather)
Julia Trumfull (grandmother)
Cheryl (cousin)
History:
Salem Saberhagen was born into a world of magic. Both his parents, Gummo and France, were practitioners of the mystic arts, so it was only natural for their son to do the same. As Salem grew older, he showed an impressive aptitude for most kinds of magic, going so far as to be known as a magical genius. He trained under some of the best magic practitioners in the world, and it did not take many decades before he joined their ranks.
Quest for World Domination
Salem's quest to take over the world did not happen overnight; the attempt was made 25 years ago, but his planning and desire for it grew much longer than that. Several hundred years before, these traits of megalomania began to fester inside him, mostly due to a growing dislike for the inaction of the magical community and their disinterest in meddling with the communities of the non-magical humans. Salem had seen humans go to war over the silliest of things, killing scraps and fighting for gods they had never even met or knew for sure existed.
This, combined with the warlock's massive ego, caused him to come to one conclusion. The world would be a better place if he were the one in charge of everything! He did also have the power needed to back this up, and with enough time, he was certain he could sway other members of the homo magi to join his cause.
He did have a following, a growing group of wizards, witches and magical creatures who, like him, shared the view that regular humans were too stupid to know what was best for them. Maybe his plan would have worked. If not for one small but very big fact, the rest of the magical community was against the idea that a warlock, however powerful, would become "Emperor of the World". So, it was natural that Salem was on a collision course with the other great forces of the earth, resulting in a great magical war, which ended with a duel between Salem Saberhagen and the Sorcerer Supreme of the time, The Ancient One. For all his bluster, Salem was a very powerful warlock, so the duel lasted a good while before he lost.
As the dust settled, a few things did become clear to the victorious. In his defence, Salem never actually fell to corruption. He never used magic to strengthen himself at the cost of his own sanity or soul. No demon had a claim to him. His reasoning, flawed as it was, had still come from a place of genuine care. Instead of being imprisoned, it was decided amongst the magical community of the time that the warlock should get a chance to redeem himself.
So, a powerful curse was placed upon him that for 100 years, he would be forced to live as a cat, with the option of a short sentence if he agreed to "Community service" from time to time. It was either that or being locked away for much, much longer.
Salem reluctantly agreed.
Life as a Cat
After being turned into a cat, Salem was placed in the care of one of his followers, Hilda Spellman, as she had been part of the refreshments committee, and thus, caring for his needs as a cat was her sentence. He began to spend the following 25 years in the Spellman household, a Victorian house in Westbridge, a small suburb near Boston. A few years later, the family was joined by Hilda's and Zelda's niece, Sabrina, as her father, Edward, got called away to the foreign services and her mother, Diana, went on an archaeological dig in Peru. This was during a period when magic was still a hidden secret, and most practitioners of the mystic arts kept to themselves, only meeting each other in safe havens.
Life in the Spellman house was... interesting. Salem took on a sort of mix between a mentor role and familiar for the fledgeling witch upon her powers manifesting—even if many of his pieces of advice ended in... mixed results, with a few highlights being.
It was after Sabrina eloped with Harvey that Salem's life took a turn in a very different direction, having been a cat for 32 years at the time. Since Hilda no longer needed to look after him, it was instead decided that Salem would be placed in the care of the sorcerer supreme and be given a new safe house as the Sanctum Sanctorum. When this was first decided, the Sorcerer Supreme was still The Ancient One, the same sorcerer that had defeated him years earlier. Still, he was not opposed to the idea, and living in a place filled with magic was interesting, even if he often spent time visiting Sabrina, Hild and Zelda.
He even functioned as something of an instructor for students at Kamar-Taj, at least for a time.
Advice against the Enchantress
In recent times, having spent roughly 55 years as a cat, Salem proved a valuable asset for the New Sorcerer Supreme, Stephen Strange, during the conflict with the entity known as The Enchantress. The cat could not take part in bringing her down; he did not have the magic needed to fight her. He did provide insight on how best to exorcise The Enchantress from the body of June Moon after the battle, along with functioning as a perfect, if slightly unwilling, distraction as the rest of the magicians worked to set up their initial assault. He proved that day that even if he was a coward, that did not mean he could not be a brave one at the same time. Sadly, only those present know of his heroic involvement, so giving him more to do as "Community service" seemed a good idea.
In the aftermath, together with the likes of Prudence Wharton, Salem was a strong defender of keeping June alive, voicing his own road to redemption and criticising how many of the magicians that now condemned the poor girl had been in agreement to give him a second chance years earlier. It also proved to him the incompetence of the likes of the Justice League, who seemed wholly incapable of dealing with the situation by themselves, only to swoop in and take over afterwards. Feelings Salem shaped with Doctor Strange. It was also in the aftermath of this that Salem became a member of the newly formed Darkwatch, being sucked inside due to being bound to live at the Sanctum Sanctorum, which he did harp about, but secretly approved of.
Liaison from Darkwatch
Due in part to his actions during the Enchantress crisis, it became apparent that maybe Salem could do more for Darkwatch than hang around the Sanctum Sanctorum all the time. After several suggestions, it was decided that putting his vast knowledge to good use was the best possible option, so Salem became a newly appointed liaison from the faction. He would have a purely advisatory role as and when needed or asked for by groups such as The Champions, Justice League, etc. He was knowledgeable enough to come up with useful information but not intimidating enough to seem like a threat.
Strange has most likely enjoyed sending Salem to "assist" the Justice League because he is salty about the enchantress crisis. Salem is one of the best at magical know-how, no doubt about that, so it would fill the request for someone who knows their stuff. But sending someone like Salem would be a little like malicious compliance, fulfilling the letter but not always the spirit of a request.
At the same time, it would be possible for Salem to keep an eye on the other factions for Darkwatch without seeming that big a deal, the perfect spy... an idiot.
Role Play Sample:
A blast of magic energy erupted in the distance as the battle against the Enchantress raged, with the little group of spell-casters hidden behind a powerful illusion, working strategically on how to deal with the enemy.
The gathered magicians turned their attention towards the black cat perched upon a piece of broken building, and a tense moment of awkward silence followed before Salem broke it.
"There's no need to look at me like that; only spitballing our options."
"And how would weeping uncontrollably help us in any way?"
"I wasn't trying to be helpful, John; I'm trying to survive!"
"You volunteered to come, Salem!"
"I thought we were going to that new French place down the street, Enchantés."
"When have we ever hung out before, furball?"
"I thought this was the beginning of a beautiful friendship and lots of garlic-filled lobster tails."
"Will you two stop bickering," Zatana snapped with a glare at the two. "We need to figure out how to get her away from here, and it would be stupid to unleash too much magic at once in a place like this. I think Stephen and John's plan to get her into the mirror dimension is the best one so far."
"Have you seen her out there?" Salem commented, shaking his head. "She's like a force of nature. Did you see what she did with Tights-boy? Blasted him clean across the city with the strength of an angry lady at black Friday sales. If you want any hope of that plan succeeding, you'll keep her distracted long enough to make it work."
"That's a brilliant idea, Salem. So nice of you to volunteer."
"Wait... what?"
"Zatana is right; this is your time to shine, Saberhagen."
"B-But- I-"
"Unless you want to come with us into the mirror dimension? We can always throw you at her... should buy us a few seconds before she blows you to pieces."
Salem looked at the others. Both those suggestions seemed awfully dangerous. But, if he had to pick one, it would have to be the first. If things worked out, Enchantress would be pulled out of reality... and at that point, she was their problem... not his. "I'll go, curse my own genius..." Salem climbed off the rock, muttering and whining to himself as he left the shelter.
A few seconds passed before:
"Hey, Lady! Are you at all interested in our extended warranty on second-hand broomsticks for the working witch?!"
"What? I'm making s'mores?" (Evil laugh)
Full Name:
Salem Saberhagen
Codename or Alias:
Mr Saberhagen (He insists upon it)
Anonymity
Public (To most of the world, he is... a cat)
Gender:
Male
Race:
American Shorthair (And darn proud of it!)
Age:
500+
Place Of Birth:
"The Other Realm" - Salem was born in an other-dimensional world set aside as a home for witches, mystical beings and other members of the magical community. It has many different names and iterations and mainly functions as a safe haven for magic practitioners to escape the world of mortals.
Occupation/Status:
Liaison - Functions as an advisatory role for other factions needing Magical knowledge. Maybe it was petty of Strange to appoint him this position, but he has no complaints about swinging his weight around, as small as it is from a physical sense. It was certainly pettiness from Doctor Strange that made sure he would send Salem to any requests from the Justice League.
Alignment:
Neutral
Factions:
Darkwatch - Forced membership due to his sentencing as a cat.
Canon Or Original?:
Canon (Archie Comics)
Powers/Abilities:
- The Cat with the Know-How: Salem, having lived for many years, possesses a wealth of knowledge about magic, the supernatural, and various other subjects. Before being turned into a cat for 100 years, Salem was an extremely powerful warlock, and he has not lost the knowledge he possessed during this period, just most of the ability to use it himself. He can be a very effective teacher for other spellcasters, and his knowledge rivals many of the world's most powerful wizards and witches.
- Better than Cats!: Salem has a wonderful singing voice.
- Ah, to have nine lives:Due to his skill and power, even as a cat, Salem is virtually immortal in terms of ageing. Becoming a cat has also given him a great knack for survival, and he has been known to get out of trouble that would spell the end of most people. He has survived falls from great heights, being launched into the air, etc.
- Potioneer Extraordineer: Due to his loss of spellcasting, the only way for Salem to readily practice magic is with the brewing of potions and other magics that can be done using objects. He could potentially use specific wands or artefacts, as long as it doesn't require him to hold them gracefully or speak if he is forced to hold them in his mouth. (No thumbs, after all)
Weapons/Items:
"Here's my Christmas list, can opener!"
"But you wouldn't be able to use a can opener."
"To HIT you with!"
Enchanted Kitty Collar: An enchanted collar that Salem was given (forced to wear) as part of his recent community service duties as Liaison for Darkwatch. It has been designed to protect him from danger and harm should he find himself in such a situation. If danger is detected, such as him being attacked or similar, an extremely powerful spell creates a protective sphere around the cat. It is durable enough to take a blow from the likes of Superman, or blasts of powerful spells, without breaking. It also protects Salem from any harm while inside it... it is also very portable and, to the glee of some young heroes... puntable, less so for the occupant.
Appearance
Physical Appearance:
Salem is an American Shorthair cat with black fur and piercing yellow eyes. Due to his own pride and sometimes the intervention of others, his fur is kept well-groomed and clean. He is the average size of an American Shorthair, roughly 25cm in height and 38cm in length. His weight varies wildly depending on how much he has gorged himself on tuna, but on average, he is slightly over the recommended 7 kg of an adult male.
Clothing and Armor:
"I dressed up as Madame Moon for last year's Halloween party; she turned my fur red for a week, and I'm not even close to ginger... I have a soul!"
Despite being a cat, Salem is in possession of a surprisingly big wardrobe of different outfits, ranging from hats down to fancy shirts and even his very own specially tailored suit.
Personality
"Dogs guard. Cats watch... and judge."
Sexual Orientation:
Bi-curious
General Personality:
The sound of the can opener is the only thing that makes me feel truly alive.
On the surface, and most of the time, Salem is known for his sharp wit and sarcastic sense of humour. He often makes clever remarks and provides comic relief in various situations, usually at the expense of himself, albeit not often intended that way. He is also something of a coward, maybe due to being largely powerless as a cat compared to how powerful he used to be as a warlock. He also tends to have a cynical outlook on life, viewing things with a dry sense of grimness. That doesn't mean he cannot be manipulative when he wants or stands to gain something. Despite being a cat, Salem is quite cunning and often tries to manipulate situations to his advantage, with mixed results.
Still, due to his many years as a cat, Salem has come to regret many of his choices as a human wizard. He has at least some regrets for the actions that led to his punishment. If this comes from a place of genuine remorse or more from the annoyance of being a cat remains to be seen, he would claim the former. He is, and will always be, a schemer. His ambitious plotting often includes attempts to become wealthy, achieve celebrity status, regain his magical powers, and return to his human form. He has a knack for giving poor advice, often involving using magic to solve a problem, which always creates more trouble than it solves.
Salem has a habit of using a high-pitched, whiny voice or a low-toned voice when talking about something humorous and often purposely places emphasis on the wrong syllable when saying certain words or names. He also sometimes switches the "a" and the "y" in words that end in "ay," such as wanting to rename Friday to "Fridya!" He also frequently uses the phrase "geh?!" when surprised or scared.
His favourite pastimes include playing with yarn, lint spotting, and surfing the internet (pretending to be a woman for attention). He loves Lizard Flakes, a snack for cats which is said to be fattening and full of cholesterol.
Despite his arrogance, greed, and sarcasm, he does really care about those close to him.
Face/Voice:
Nick Bakay (Voice)
Anything Else?
Character's History
Siblings:
Mother:
France Trumfull Saberhagen
Father:
Gummo Saberhagen
Other Family:
Annabelle Saberhagen (daughter)
Morty Saberhagen (uncle)
Goliath Saberhagen (uncle)
Humphrey Saberhagen (grandfather)
Julia Trumfull (grandmother)
Cheryl (cousin)
History:
Salem Saberhagen was born into a world of magic. Both his parents, Gummo and France, were practitioners of the mystic arts, so it was only natural for their son to do the same. As Salem grew older, he showed an impressive aptitude for most kinds of magic, going so far as to be known as a magical genius. He trained under some of the best magic practitioners in the world, and it did not take many decades before he joined their ranks.
Quest for World Domination
Salem's quest to take over the world did not happen overnight; the attempt was made 25 years ago, but his planning and desire for it grew much longer than that. Several hundred years before, these traits of megalomania began to fester inside him, mostly due to a growing dislike for the inaction of the magical community and their disinterest in meddling with the communities of the non-magical humans. Salem had seen humans go to war over the silliest of things, killing scraps and fighting for gods they had never even met or knew for sure existed.
This, combined with the warlock's massive ego, caused him to come to one conclusion. The world would be a better place if he were the one in charge of everything! He did also have the power needed to back this up, and with enough time, he was certain he could sway other members of the homo magi to join his cause.
He did have a following, a growing group of wizards, witches and magical creatures who, like him, shared the view that regular humans were too stupid to know what was best for them. Maybe his plan would have worked. If not for one small but very big fact, the rest of the magical community was against the idea that a warlock, however powerful, would become "Emperor of the World". So, it was natural that Salem was on a collision course with the other great forces of the earth, resulting in a great magical war, which ended with a duel between Salem Saberhagen and the Sorcerer Supreme of the time, The Ancient One. For all his bluster, Salem was a very powerful warlock, so the duel lasted a good while before he lost.
As the dust settled, a few things did become clear to the victorious. In his defence, Salem never actually fell to corruption. He never used magic to strengthen himself at the cost of his own sanity or soul. No demon had a claim to him. His reasoning, flawed as it was, had still come from a place of genuine care. Instead of being imprisoned, it was decided amongst the magical community of the time that the warlock should get a chance to redeem himself.
So, a powerful curse was placed upon him that for 100 years, he would be forced to live as a cat, with the option of a short sentence if he agreed to "Community service" from time to time. It was either that or being locked away for much, much longer.
Salem reluctantly agreed.
Life as a Cat
After being turned into a cat, Salem was placed in the care of one of his followers, Hilda Spellman, as she had been part of the refreshments committee, and thus, caring for his needs as a cat was her sentence. He began to spend the following 25 years in the Spellman household, a Victorian house in Westbridge, a small suburb near Boston. A few years later, the family was joined by Hilda's and Zelda's niece, Sabrina, as her father, Edward, got called away to the foreign services and her mother, Diana, went on an archaeological dig in Peru. This was during a period when magic was still a hidden secret, and most practitioners of the mystic arts kept to themselves, only meeting each other in safe havens.
Life in the Spellman house was... interesting. Salem took on a sort of mix between a mentor role and familiar for the fledgeling witch upon her powers manifesting—even if many of his pieces of advice ended in... mixed results, with a few highlights being.
- Salem entered a Cat Show hosted by Bob Gordan for prestige and money. He almost won the whole thing, but when Sabrina turned herself into a cat, she won instead. Still, the young witch gave Salem the blue ribbon as he was "the best cat."
- Salem helped Sabrina study for her Witch's License and discovered that perhaps he was not a bad teacher after all. It felt nice to help others succeed and bring out their best.
- He was temporarily turned into "a real boy". But he got another 50 years added to his sentence as a cat when he tried taking over the world... again.
- With the aid of Sabrina, Salem reconnected with his estranged daughter Annabelle Saberhagen, who wanted her father to walk her down the aisle at her wedding despite being a cat.
- Hilda was pardoned for her involvement in Salem's plans for world domination, and as such, she no longer had to care for Salem. He was moved to another safe house, which turned out to be a labour camp, where he was very miserable until rescued by the Spellmans once they noticed how much they missed him.
- He accidentally erased the much beloved holiday, Bobunk by accident, and sadly the change became permanent.
- At her wedding, Salem also gave Sabrina an envelope of cash as a gift, filled with money he had been stealing from her birthday cards for years.
It was after Sabrina eloped with Harvey that Salem's life took a turn in a very different direction, having been a cat for 32 years at the time. Since Hilda no longer needed to look after him, it was instead decided that Salem would be placed in the care of the sorcerer supreme and be given a new safe house as the Sanctum Sanctorum. When this was first decided, the Sorcerer Supreme was still The Ancient One, the same sorcerer that had defeated him years earlier. Still, he was not opposed to the idea, and living in a place filled with magic was interesting, even if he often spent time visiting Sabrina, Hild and Zelda.
He even functioned as something of an instructor for students at Kamar-Taj, at least for a time.
Advice against the Enchantress
In recent times, having spent roughly 55 years as a cat, Salem proved a valuable asset for the New Sorcerer Supreme, Stephen Strange, during the conflict with the entity known as The Enchantress. The cat could not take part in bringing her down; he did not have the magic needed to fight her. He did provide insight on how best to exorcise The Enchantress from the body of June Moon after the battle, along with functioning as a perfect, if slightly unwilling, distraction as the rest of the magicians worked to set up their initial assault. He proved that day that even if he was a coward, that did not mean he could not be a brave one at the same time. Sadly, only those present know of his heroic involvement, so giving him more to do as "Community service" seemed a good idea.
In the aftermath, together with the likes of Prudence Wharton, Salem was a strong defender of keeping June alive, voicing his own road to redemption and criticising how many of the magicians that now condemned the poor girl had been in agreement to give him a second chance years earlier. It also proved to him the incompetence of the likes of the Justice League, who seemed wholly incapable of dealing with the situation by themselves, only to swoop in and take over afterwards. Feelings Salem shaped with Doctor Strange. It was also in the aftermath of this that Salem became a member of the newly formed Darkwatch, being sucked inside due to being bound to live at the Sanctum Sanctorum, which he did harp about, but secretly approved of.
Liaison from Darkwatch
Due in part to his actions during the Enchantress crisis, it became apparent that maybe Salem could do more for Darkwatch than hang around the Sanctum Sanctorum all the time. After several suggestions, it was decided that putting his vast knowledge to good use was the best possible option, so Salem became a newly appointed liaison from the faction. He would have a purely advisatory role as and when needed or asked for by groups such as The Champions, Justice League, etc. He was knowledgeable enough to come up with useful information but not intimidating enough to seem like a threat.
Strange has most likely enjoyed sending Salem to "assist" the Justice League because he is salty about the enchantress crisis. Salem is one of the best at magical know-how, no doubt about that, so it would fill the request for someone who knows their stuff. But sending someone like Salem would be a little like malicious compliance, fulfilling the letter but not always the spirit of a request.
At the same time, it would be possible for Salem to keep an eye on the other factions for Darkwatch without seeming that big a deal, the perfect spy... an idiot.
Role Play Sample:
A blast of magic energy erupted in the distance as the battle against the Enchantress raged, with the little group of spell-casters hidden behind a powerful illusion, working strategically on how to deal with the enemy.
The gathered magicians turned their attention towards the black cat perched upon a piece of broken building, and a tense moment of awkward silence followed before Salem broke it.
"There's no need to look at me like that; only spitballing our options."
"And how would weeping uncontrollably help us in any way?"
"I wasn't trying to be helpful, John; I'm trying to survive!"
"You volunteered to come, Salem!"
"I thought we were going to that new French place down the street, Enchantés."
"When have we ever hung out before, furball?"
"I thought this was the beginning of a beautiful friendship and lots of garlic-filled lobster tails."
"Will you two stop bickering," Zatana snapped with a glare at the two. "We need to figure out how to get her away from here, and it would be stupid to unleash too much magic at once in a place like this. I think Stephen and John's plan to get her into the mirror dimension is the best one so far."
"Have you seen her out there?" Salem commented, shaking his head. "She's like a force of nature. Did you see what she did with Tights-boy? Blasted him clean across the city with the strength of an angry lady at black Friday sales. If you want any hope of that plan succeeding, you'll keep her distracted long enough to make it work."
"That's a brilliant idea, Salem. So nice of you to volunteer."
"Wait... what?"
"Zatana is right; this is your time to shine, Saberhagen."
"B-But- I-"
"Unless you want to come with us into the mirror dimension? We can always throw you at her... should buy us a few seconds before she blows you to pieces."
Salem looked at the others. Both those suggestions seemed awfully dangerous. But, if he had to pick one, it would have to be the first. If things worked out, Enchantress would be pulled out of reality... and at that point, she was their problem... not his. "I'll go, curse my own genius..." Salem climbed off the rock, muttering and whining to himself as he left the shelter.
A few seconds passed before:
"Hey, Lady! Are you at all interested in our extended warranty on second-hand broomsticks for the working witch?!"
