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Post by FreudTastic on Nov 19, 2023 20:20:26 GMT
"Boss! 'Ey Boss, Jamie! Who're we meeting again, huh?" the incessant inquisitive imp would keep repeating the question as he and his master, Jamison Farthwell AKA "Occult", were wandering through the hallways of the Sanctum Sanctorum, as the man himself was keeping himself in a rather uptight stance as he strode with intent, and his impish companion just kept scurrying about, occasionally leaping into one shadow only to reappear out of another, sometimes dangling out of a wall, and sometime popping up from the floor like a demented Whack-a-Mole. But Jamison just stops to straighten his suit collar a bit before he waits for the imp to join his side again.
"His name, from what I've heard, is 'Salem', Ezmo. And he is supposedly a fellow warlock, such as myself. I'm quite looking forward to this, actually. Stephen's company is certainly an honor in and of itself, but it's been a while since I met someone of my own profession." he explains to the imp, as Ezmo just scratches his hooded head for a bit. "Don't worry, I'm sure he'll be a JOY to be around... or at the very least, it'll be nice to meet someone of similar interests." and he'd soon resume his stride, with Ezmo opting to hop up onto Jamison's shoulder and hang off of it, surprisingly to no discomfort of the warlock himself.
'And if anything-' thought the shadow imp to himself, as a wicked grin spread on his muzzle. 'I'll get a fun new person to mess around with~'
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Post by DornKoon on Nov 19, 2023 20:38:24 GMT
There sure had been an influx of new members into Darkwatch lately. Something was happening, or Strange was getting more antsy than usual due to the Justice League. New members did mean many new opportunities to mess with someone, and if there was something Salem enjoyed more than anything, it was to mess with people... or generally judge them. From what Strange had mentioned, this new addition was a fellow warlock, Farthwell. It was not a name Salem was familiar with, so he was most likely a young warlock, young being a relative term for the cat's 555 years of age.
Salem sat perched on a cabinet as Occult walked down the corridor, looking like a man on a mission; if a little tense, that would not do at all. "Hello there, don't believe I saw you in the Sanctum before? Fresh recruit, I take it? Doc's been busy lately." he said as the warlock came closer. No one could ever say that Salem did not see an opportunity when it showed itself to him, and in this case, it could be spelt out with one word, delicious canned tuna. "You and your little friend there look lost. Might I perhaps be of assistance?" as he was thinking. "Yeees, I can practically taste it already, and all I need from you are those convenient opposable thumbs! Nyahahaha..."
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Post by FreudTastic on Nov 19, 2023 20:53:50 GMT
He had been in his own headspace for a while as he marched down the corridor, but as soon as a voice rung out from... somewhere, Jamison would stop himself in his tracks and look around, soon enough locating the source of the voice itself as he'd look up to spot... a cat. Was this cat really the one speaking? Or was it someone projecting their voice into it? He'd squint his eyes in slight disbelief, and Ezmo... 'stared' at him, even with his lack of visible eyes.
"... Okay, either I had too much Hennessy the other day, or... no, of course there'd be a soddin' talking cat." Jamison huffs, a bit bashful over being caught off-guard in a sanctum filled with the mysterious and magical. "Aherm, sorry about that, lil' fellow. But yes, uhm... we're looking for one 'Mr. Saberhagen'? The Doctor said he'd be around this wing of the sanctum. I suppose you don't know of his whereabouts?" he'd inquire. All the while, Jamison's imp companion was not done staring STRAIGHT at Salem, almost as if the demonic creature could TELL that something was up. He was a creature of mischief, so naturally, he'd be attracted to it like a fly is attracted to cow-dung.
"... I dun' like this one, Boss. He's giving off a weird vibe." he mutters aloud to Jamison, and for Salem himself to hear. Letting him know that out of the two of them, at least SOMEONE kept their (unseen) eyes on him. "Better watch yerself, kitty cat. I dun' like people who mess with the Boss, y'hear me?"
"Ezmo... what have I told you about aggressive greetings?" Jamison slowly pushes Ezmo down on his shoulder again, letting the demon piggyback ride off of him, but still Ezmo did stare at Salem. "He gets a little... antsy with new people sometimes. Don't mind him. But I agree... strange you'd pop up with such convenience. Who are you, exactly?"
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Post by DornKoon on Nov 19, 2023 21:12:34 GMT
Lil'fellow?! Now, that was a little insulting; he was a cat, after all... not a dog. On top of that, his little imp was staring at him, which did make Salem slightly uncomfortable, but he refused to let it show and instead gave the creature a judgemental cat-glare before turning to Occult again. "Yeah, I know the guy and could show you where he is. This place can be a maze if you're not used to it." He replied, followed by a small yawn. "IF you're willing to do something for me first. You seem the type used to making deals, so I trust you would not oppose it." The black cat paused, stood up and climbed down from the cabinet, trotting further down the corridor before looking back at Occult.
"I can even sweeten the deal and promise to tell you all about myself on top of showing you to Mr Saberhagen." He added, tail up in the shape of a slanted S "I mean, is your choice. I'm going this here way, and you can follow me if you agree to assist me. I promise you won't find him without my assistance, and I need someone with your innate gifts."
Salem did not say more before taking off, making his way down a few corridors before arriving at the Sanctorum kitchen, and thankfully, no one was there. Salem climbed onto the kitchen island and waited.
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Post by FreudTastic on Nov 20, 2023 18:41:12 GMT
"Making deals! Pah! He's already got a deal with me, kitty! So shoo!" Ezmo blurts out again, getting a bit defensive once more, but Jamison calms him down with a FIRM, but endearing head-pat, the imp mumbling and slowly relenting.
"And that, Ezmo, is once again what we call a 'metaphor'. Plus it wasn't THAT type of deal, even I can tell." Jamison tells his imp, before he turns just in time to spot the cat leap down from the cabinet and start to trot down the corridor... in the same direction he just came from. Now that was a bit odd... he had been instructed SPECIFICALLY by the Doctor himself that he was in THIS wing of the mansion. So why was this cat now leading them AWAY... it made him scratch his head a bit, but he'd simply smile. "Well, how about you go ahead. I will have one last look around here before I return. Oh and don't worry, I should be able to track you with no issue." but before he even finished his sentence, it seems that the cat already took off. Now Ezmo hops off his master's back and moves to stand in front of him, while Occult just mumbles to himself.
"I say we just ditch'em, Boss! He's clearly up to no good! Even I can sense it!" he huffs indignantly, trying his best to be supportive of his master, and give him hints that this clearly was a bad idea. But, it seems that even Occult was starting to feel something was off with this. "... Boss? You thinkin'?"
"... This is all buggerin' me far too much to be a coincidence." he mutters aloud as he marches back and forth in the hallway. "How come he so conveniently shows up, and offers me to find Mr. Saberhagen just like that... is this a trick? Is he just fuckin' with us?" he gives up eventually though, deciding to just roll with it. "Well, let's see if our feline friend can tell us what we need after we help him." he says, as Ezmo just huffs, but agrees with him eventually as he joins his side and moves off with Jamison, as both of them eventually spot him in the kitchen of all places. "Well, here of all soddin' places huh? So then, my fancy little feline... what 'gifts' are you actually in need of, hm?"
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Post by DornKoon on Nov 20, 2023 19:03:19 GMT
"How is it surprising to find a cat inside a kitchen?" Salem replied, having made himself comfortable on the kitchen island when Occult walked into the kitchen with his little imp companion, paws neatly tucked away into a loaf. "He called me fancy. This is off to a good start, now you just need to play it cool, Salem, just play it cool." Salem thought to himself before clearing his throat. He would need to play his card right; the tuna was calling, and he was hankering for some of the nice stuff!
"Well, one of the cans of tuna in that cabinet over there would do nicely, not the cheap one in water, one of the nice cans in the back; think there is one with extra olive oil." Salem gestured with one of his paws to a cabinet over the kitchen counter, and inside was an assortment of canned/dry food, tuna being among them. "Just bring it out and pop the lid for me, and we will all get what we want before you say, Bobunk!"
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Post by FreudTastic on Nov 20, 2023 19:16:16 GMT
"Well, just saying this is a big place. I suppose you'd think that anywhere you'd sit would be your throne, if my experiences with cats are of any use." Jamison jovially just informs Salem, while Ezmo just huffs as he'd plant his hands at the edge of the kitchen island and pulling himself up to where he could rest his chin on the edge, looking over at the cat and still keeping his 'eyes' on him. Especially when the little rascal of a cat had the gall to ask Jamison to do something so menial of a task! But, to Ezmo's surprise, his human companion would just smirk a bit and nod. "Certainly." and he'd just give a quick glance to Ezmo, before turning to look into the cabinet.
"... Wha' the hell's Bobunk?" Ezmo then asks Salem while Jamison occupies himself with digging out the perfect can of extra virgin olive oil-soaked tuna. The imp pulls himself up further on the kitchen island, propping himself up by his arms and elbows as he tilts his head curiously, the tip of his very elongated hood seemingly moving on its own, like a tail made out of cloth, as it'd rub across his head in confusion. "Tha' doesn't sound real! You're just makin' stuff up!"
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Post by DornKoon on Nov 20, 2023 19:41:34 GMT
"Yeah, that is true; I should have my own throne." Salem commented with a sagely nod. "But Strange wouldn't let me have one..." He muttered to himself. He had really tried to get himself a throne, but the Sorcerer Borreme thought it a "waste of resources" and did not want to stroke his ego; he was a cat... he was basically all ego. Salem yawned, and his eyes slowly drifted to Ezmo as the little imp talked.
Salem let out a deep, nostalgic sigh before shaking his head. "Yes, you asking that would be the point of why it's so sad; it was such a waste, curse my youthful ignorance. No one remembers Bobunk anymore; it used to bring such joy to children of all ages. Nothing could beat a good Bobunk." Salem let out another wistful sigh before he continued. "During a party in the other realm, I once accidentally erased the holiday of Bobunk, and because I could not solve the problem and get it back within 24 hours... Bobunk was permanently erased. In fact, a young witch I know almost permanently erased Christmas a few years ago. Thankfully, she returned it in time, so it did not get the same fate as... Bobunk." Salem let out a small heartbroken sob, "there just was no, Father Bobunk."
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Post by FreudTastic on Dec 7, 2023 18:41:25 GMT
Ezmo was busy pulling himself up proper onto the kitchen island to sit himself up on it, cross-legged and elbows on his knees as he kept his hands propping up his chin. The little imp seemed absorbed into Salem's tale about this 'Bobunk'... sounded like a weird holiday. He'd tilt his head a bit as Salem went onto his tirade, kneading his chin idly in his hands as he just listened to him. "Eeehh... sorry bud', still not fully convinced y'ain' just spewin' hogwash. Bu' wait... y'said you were partyin' in the Other Realm? Ain' no way a CAT could just be struttin' his way into the Other Realm! Ye'd hafta be a dang good magician to get to the realm o' demons! Or at least find someone who can take ya there!"
"Either way... terrible soddin' loss of a perfectly good holiday, from the sounds of it!" came the voice of Jamison, followed by a grunt of struggle as he was digging around the cabinet, until he found his target; a can, not of the tuna that Salem requested, but spicy pickled jalapenos. He'd smirk to himself, and while Ezmo would keep Salem busy and occupied with entertaining his ranting about 'Bobunk'... and his admittedly odd tale of being to the Other Realm... Jamison would wave his free hand and swipe it across the can he had picked up, and with a quick use of Illusion magic, he'd change the can of jalapenos -- the can and label themselves, the contents, and even the aroma of said contents -- into a delicious-looking, fine can of fresh tuna, soaked in only the most extra virgin of olive oil.
"Ah~! There we are, sorry about the wait!" he'd huff as he pulled himself out of the cabinet, and walk back to the kitchen island, and popped the can open for Salem, revealing the oil-covered, 'fishy' content inside. "Dig in, friend!"
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Post by DornKoon on Dec 10, 2023 15:40:29 GMT
"Whoever said I was a normal cat?" Salem retorted, taking a moment to focus his eyes on the little demon. "I'll have you know I gave lessons to one of our time's most powerful witches." There was a pause. " Besides, we had an entrance into the Other Realm inside our second-floor closet, so getting there was very easy; I just needed help to work the door handle." He held up a paw, flexing it to show his lack of thumbs. "Do miss the convenience of it. The mortal realm isn't the same... and the few things giving me true joy here is my ongoing feud with the neighbour; I tried to get Strange to mount me a trebuchet on the roof. Still have no clue why he thought it a bad idea."
"Oh yes, it was was!" Salem said to Jamison with a sage nod. "But those are the hits we need to take from poor choices, which, thankfully, I make very few off."
The cat watched as the warlock collected the "tuna" from the cabinet, feeling very pleased. When the can was opened, he could feel the delicious smell of fresh tuna. "Now this is the stuff! Hehehe, don't mind if I do!" He did not hesitate when digging in, taking as big of a mouthful of "tuna" as he could.
Silence.... followed by instant regret!
"Geh!?" Salem's eyes widened, and the expected taste of tuna became a very different experience as jalapenos assaulted his tongue. "T-This is not tuna!!" He continued, furiously licking at the air, batting at his tongue with a paw, tail bushed up and twitching. After a few seconds, his yellow eyes slowly turned to look at Jamison, narrowed. "Illusion..." was all he said before he let out a furious HARRUMPH!, shoving the whole can of the count as if he owed him money, sending it crashing to the floor.
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Post by FreudTastic on Dec 27, 2023 16:43:16 GMT
"Ezmo!" came Jamison's quick command, to which the imp only grinned and saluted Jamison the moment Salem shoved the can off the counter, and the imp fell backwards and off the counter, but did not land on the floor. Instead, he landed on a shadow cast by the kitchen island, and zipped right into it, only to pop out of another one right where the jalapenos were supposed to land, catching the jar that had now returned to its original state. "Got it Boss~!" he declared, through a starting fit of demonic cackling as Ezmo ended up rolling on the floor with laughter at their little jape, bashing his fist on the floor laughing while Jamison just smirked coyly, and opened up the nearby fridge door to pull out a container of heavy cream, opening up the lid and putting it before Salem, and immediately pulling his hands away and holding them open, as if to show no trickery was involved.
"Dairy products help to numb the spiciness." he explains before he would sit on a stool at the island, elbows propped up and his chin resting on his tucked-up hands, staring at Salem with a bemused look. "... 'Whoever said I was a normal cat'. Indeed... you truly said it yourself." he muses with a bit of a smirk. "And missing the convenience of thumbs, showing you HAD them at one point, but was then transmogrified... into this. Something tells me... I've had the man I was looking for right under my soddin' nose. So, how's about it? You tell me EXACTLY who you are, and maybe... I'll make it worth your while. I'll grab an ACTUAL can of tuna for you. And let you keep the cream. Do we have a deal?"
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Post by DornKoon on Jan 2, 2024 10:37:35 GMT
Salem looked at the spot that should have been empty, only for the can to be there again. His eyes narrowed as he looked over the edge of the counter down at the little imp, rolling on the floor, laughing his ass off. So, that's how it was going to be?! Well, Salem was no stranger to conflict. He looked to Jamison as he came over with a container of heavy cream... and he eyed the carton, before walking over and taking a few seconds lapping at the milk before sitting back down.
"Look at Mr Genius and his tiny golf ball." Said Salem, "Why should I tell you anything? You've already broken our first deal. You're clearly not one to be trusted." He poked at the can to emphasize his words, his tail whipping in annoyance. "At least I planned to fulfil my end without tricking you into getting your face full of capsaicin; that's just poor manners, messing with a man's tuna... for shame. The audacity. Is nothing sacred anymore?!" Salem placed a dramatic paw on his forehead. "Young wizards have no standards these days."
There was a pause as Salem continued to glare at Jamison.
" So, no maybes, Buster. Give.me.tuna." Salem pointed with his paw to the cabinet.
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Post by FreudTastic on Aug 28, 2024 20:34:40 GMT
"Apparently nothin's sacred to ya either, pussy-cat!" Ezmo butts in as he has already clambered back up along Jamison's back, now perched atop of the warlock's shoulder for a bit as the man just grins a self-satisfied grin at the cat, hands put together and fingers splayed out. Oh he was loving this far too much, he could tell. He was really trying to reel himself in, but that grin was all but plastered to his face. "We's ain't as dumb as ya think, cat! I could tell from the beginnin' something was fishy, even without ya precious tuna. An' I dun' take kindly to people messin' with tha' Boss." that last sentence devolved into something truly threatening, as Ezmo's right clawed hand opens up slowly, an orb of brilliant orange and red arcane energies floating and growing in size, up to the size of a baseball, until--
"Ezmo. Down." came Jamison's command, to which the orb of energy was snuffed out in an instant, and Ezmo huffs and scuttles back to sit on the edge of the kitchen island. "Tuna coming right up." the human then adds as he moves over to the cabinet once again, and this time grabs a can of olive-soaked tuna. For real this time. "I'll even have a bit myself to prove it. Fancy having a momentary 'poison' taster?" he'd chuckle jovially as he sat opposite of Salem once more.
"Now then... where were we?"
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Post by DornKoon on Aug 28, 2024 21:19:40 GMT
"That is agreeable," said Salem with a slight nod. "Bring on the tuna, and keep the golf ball away at a distance..." He gave the little imp a piercing feline glare before looking at Jamison again. " But to answer your previous question, yes, I'm Salem, Salem Sabgerhagen, Darkwatch Liaison, and I could argue the most knowledgeable on magic in this place. These little games are one of the few delights I have these days..."
He stretched himself before he let out a huff.
"And, you're correct, I'm not a cat, well I am, but this is a spell; I'm stuck as a cat for 100 years, or well... 45 at this point. That's what you get when trying to take over the world." There was a pause as Salem's mind drifted back to that fateful duel against the Ancient One. What a duel it had been, one for the ages. "Still, they could have killed me, but the collected power of magic decided I was to be given a chance to... better myself."
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Post by FreudTastic on Sept 11, 2024 17:57:53 GMT
"And clearly your plan of bettering yourself is going oh-so swimmingly, Salem." Jamison can't help but to let the sarcasm dribble out with each spoken syllable, but it was a playful kind of sarcasm. He wasn't here to judge and condemn Salem for his past actions, hell. He wasn't gonna condemn him for his attempted world dominance, even! For doing so would mean that he'd have to be a better man, and Jamison sure was no Saint George himself. So, he'd merely roll his shoulders a bit while Ezmo scuttles back over to sit near him, the imp leaning onto the human's side a bit.
"I assure you by the way, he's a lovely lil' chap once ya get to know him." he then adds, nodding his head to said imp. "He's just... very attached, y'see. Saved him from a horrid partnership with one o' the vicars from my school, if you can believe it. Then again, what sort of faith isn't steeped deep in hypocrisy these days?" he reaches over to pat the imp over his hooded head, the demonic entity letting out SURPRISINGLY purr-like noises and leaning into it further. "But, back to you-"
"Darkwatch Liaison, eh? That is one mighty hefty title, mate. One that SURELY has to be taken with the utmost responsibility..." his eyes glimmer with a dangerous, teasing mirth. "Truly, Mr. Saberhagen... you are one tricksy little feline fellow. Full of surprises, indeed."
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